Fabric donations

For refugee ladies wishing to sew:
we are looking for groups who would like to create bags, dresses, children’s clothes: we can help with patterns and production
let us know on this blog or call 07436004663
Many thanks


Gestation Times

Shows anxiety is really severe in a group or proximity of someone:

the Spurs exercise sessions are great but was not able to stay as post trauma panic took over… visiting the studio is harder now that the risk assessments are still pending and we do not know the reasons for the drive-by shooting 5-5-17 on 2 living targets inside workshop and maybe 5-6 outside.

My hands are not working, and I am often not finding keys, and other important items that make our lives safe.

My work is my major passion and investment and because I have helped for the past 8 years, I find it difficult to find that now I am the one needing the help.

 Our June mission to transform our mums with one signature design in on hold for lack of workspace and time, having given it all away to pacify area with officials and locals.

Saturday Workpage– unaccountered-


Freelancer– Volunteer– ACA Work regulations– Community Benefactor– Educator–  Green cause–  Textile impact– Save patrimony– Reshore– Cultural Cohesion– Recognition– Status not Stigma– Emotional wellbeing– Innovative impact– Creative origination– Career progression– Positive Modelling– Community area risk assessment– Occupational Health– Accountability

Current health:

I have worked full time on this case, and would like to reach the end by end of June: I live without being able to plan in the uncertainty: do not know who will cover collateral damages (change window, rent while not at work), what positive measures will come out, including reference letter for 8 years of service, and written reports regarding accountability, risk assessment and occupational health, and recognition of a positive model to be offered to society.

I am still not able to use hands which do not seem to connect with my heart or brain any longer,  sewing machine or scissors to cut fabric or patterns. My memory is not working in the same way, everything washes out, and I spend hours logging every mail for every party involved to keep track of what has been achieved for next step, avoiding repetitions, writing hand diary, and blogging to help evaluation of progress and reach positive outcome.


1- First objective My main goal was to pacify the area to avoid a violent aftermath that would traumatise a third time, this time women being at the epicentre of 8 years hard work to maintain some sense of community life, so went carefully about relating the positive story first hand for people to discover, a positive model that might help others… but not INCOGNITO: this is the work of 8 years innovation and community involvement where everyone played a part and we wish to share our sense of hope and well being for nurturing a positive endeavour in the heart of what is known perceived stigmatised remembered (sadly) as the harshest in London, and if it may help, redeeming, as with every trauma, there is guilt and wish to make amends for all that suffered, and apologise for the past, yet preventing the worse so this cycle can take a new turn… because on this third potential eruptive event, cooperation have made all the difference towards a truly positive society.

2- The second biggest task was/is to find all the elements needed to create a 3 tier area risk assessment: I have gathered information from insures and local law advice centre and still have not managed to collect firm reports from Management or Council: following recent meeting with officials on 15, I am now able to have an informed meeting with Management on 20th of June.

3- Thirdly connecting with current groups of action for communities help shape a new future

4- Forth connecting with own community at Farm

5- Fifth connecting with students and their respective environments to offer free support and pursue plans

6- Sixth connecting with myself and find the way forward, as a freelancer, volunteer


While I am waiting for area full risk assessment I am making workshop visits by appointments at various times to check  and test to help with final assessment.

People have advised to review my priorities for health and like the Spurs free exercise taster on Tuesday ( we had to change workstation in a circuit manner, so it helps to operate at all levels) , I will follow this active model and hope  6- will soon become 1… Thank you Spurs Foundation for offering the free get fit summer programme, which I found by chance on way back from GP at Green Leisure Centre and have recommended

Weekly progress:

17-6-17 Saturday time for Account in Blog: hand notes 7-30-8-8:40– computer input: now 11:40 this log: 3hrs

Friday Week 6: 9-16 June

Test workshop visits: 1:   16-6-17 : I have not been since Sunday 11 where I saw the naked bottom of a woman and freaked out, did not report as it sounds really trivial compared with other news

Intense first official meeting with Haringey Official (15-6-17), send 7 individual update mails to councillors, officials and other parties contacted in Regeneration, Impact, MP, Police

Friday 16 June : first time I tell student, first time I see dad – lady and gent  from 5-5-17, first time community feels present and united, first time I speak to Management, first time I understand how stigmatised the area is and how positive work will not be acknowledged, not just for freelancers, innovators, rescuers of fabrics factories, people and spaces, and how much efforts going unnoticed help the officials shape strategically in the background, using positive ideas as their own model of a better society… I think it can be more powerful as one… but this vision, which I have already seen signs of during visits, will shape and come to life in a few years… carefully eradicating the point of creative origination… unwilling to render credit to a community labelled and doomed from the outside, yet used for reaping financial governmental input… especially after 2011 when really it was a case of mixed raced youths sacrifice for forwarding society into a more holistic stage — and there was not going to be a third tsunami wave of uncontrolled violence with women at the epicentre, which following patents, could have been the detonator to a much bigger picture… this time even bigger because, 8 years of goodness only the tip of the iceberg to say people are good and want good… That cannot be shifted, triggered into riots, equated to broken windows, negated, forgotten or not un-ACCOUNTERED for freelance volunteer work unit moving society forward…

16-6-17 Morning blog 5:30 8:30 , read report strategy 2013-2016: 1hr,

write to Colin re: meeting , update doc for volunteers (Textile library 1hr), 1hr, Lynette call (+mail),

Mr Martin first call: nice call discussing our emotional traumas, he says he cannot help with joint proposal for collateral damages because too anxious, yet I said we could try when we meet with Classford set up meeting for Tuesday 11am (45mn),

prepare sketch session: Tribute to Youths victim of sudden sad deaths, Grenfell, Manchester, recent stabbing in Tottenham:  YouthDay sketch in the Park, write to Glynis about Impact  newsletter and meeting for programme shaping, leave home 4:15

meet student in Park 4:30-6:00, receive Pack from IAPT start reading trauma page, discuss issues, how to move forward, book entry, testimony, meet Lennox, a lot of people come to say how sorry they are, first day that feelings flow in the right direction, many did not know so invite to look at glass hole behind sewing machine, now blocked by metallic board, no light coming in, no light above on ceiling, I guess these must be the dark hours… Some come in to say sorry it happened to them and I should not be scared, I tell them I did everything I could to pacify, keep women 8year positive story alive, only got a story regarding window Haringey Meeting explaining window at my expenses, Collateral Damages? and who will put me/us back the way we were? worth a piece of broken glass– stigma in my face— and if we improve things– no recognition: I asked for a letter, got a NO, straight in my face, not a let me make a note and find out…Three men and car found so , Ni says no one contacted him… we’re in total dark… but barbecue on so light might be shining. See dad who saved us all for first time… seems we’re all stronger wiser more united now… I told Sh it hurts coming from displaced background and longest stay in one employment basis, feel torn because ties very strong with everyone, this page started as a daily input… we are still here to tell… we reflect on those who lost their lives recently and know we were given a second chance… and good will come of it…

Val, Son, She and family, Den, El, Mar, Cou, Mo, Mau, Reb and friend, Ko, Lu, neighbours (3), Len, Ninj and new baby, older men cooking, family goodness community sharing feel Barbecue getting ready I go home 9:30, speak to mum to tell story, go back to pick up phone, video filming, children and grown ups, say hi to D and S

day ends 11:15 time for bed– week 6

Week 5 Friday 2-9

Test workshop visits : 2:

Friday 9June: quickly take DoE student to place darts in back of her 2 new trousers, voluntary, men smoking outside, not nice atmosphere so quickly leave and walk her home, leave on my bicycle, am really nervous coming to Farm, and wait at bottom of her flat for half hour, I see 5 people I know going inside the building as I wait, I tell her I tried to find out why she was so late and I press her to tell me the reason, one school friend was stabbed 6-6-17 so she was upset. I thought I might take her to workshop but following news we just go to duck pond to recup and talk… no need to discuss the shop at this stage… I speak to her mum and explain , and make appointment with head of her program to talk

sit by the ducks with DoE sees lady bottom from window on Sunday, unable to go there during week, Friday5 big day after elections, Colin from Impact amazingly efficient friendly, Fiona FROM WOMEN AND VIOLENCE COMES AROUND to visit studio, toilets, Mr Martin  and letter box set up (wed) Meet TJ (factory fabric donator since 2008) thurs, Meet spurs outreach for exercise programme, meet Student for talk on Line and business, update blog everyday, visit CAB for first time and register for work sick benefit, doctor calls for assessment and renews sickleave till 3-7-17 meet MP at tube station on 8th, second time I see student who was with me in studio discuss how we meet and her business ideas and how life is precious fill out form of consent for MP case investigation with Council receives a call (second) from Eubert to invite me for appointment Wed, then changed to Thursday, for half an hour with property officials

first mail from Council: the guies and car have been found no news about collateral damages, risk assessment report accountability occupational health, I update MP case official

Week 4 Friday 26- 2June  Contact MP office and have a phone conversation

Test workshop visits: 

In touch with David Lammy office to share story first hand after having pacifying local authorities, waited to contact because everything else had to be put in place first and careful to avoid disruptions  before elections

no DoE meeting, student at family reunion, difficult week, arranges meetings with Impact, Regen, fear visits at studio

A lot of time spent recording all mails in separate folders for each appointment as well documents to sent prior meeting

Artwork for future possible  program development, discussion with friend and students


Week3 Friday 19-26 May Contact IAPT as very difficult emotionally

Test workshop visits:

no DoE meeting dark time working things out, crying every day, insecurity and fear visits at studio resident walk from GP to 639, home door left open 3 times, report to police station, nothing they can do, young men arrive and trade in front of shop, I panic and inform Trident officer (101 line busy) take refuge next door while waiting for friend who was supposed to have come when I arrived, let out next door and one girl goes out to tell them not to obstruct light by standing there, then issue with D who tells me I should leave the Farm if I have an issue…Friend has arrived and hears the issues so then helps me to communicate and act in a way that can help me and others, this friend has been doing this kind of mentoring for the past 3 years and it kept me going in difficult times, since the Barber next door presence created new situations, with older men blocking both windows for hours during daytime, then the change of convenience store management also created a new situation which to this day we have struggled with, including computer service asking me to write letters, which I did without telling anyone, to make sure we would not attract problems, we received no answers to letter, we received a bullet… and working from this basis now, not for much longer because resources are gone

Week2 Friday 12- 19 May Birthday of first Youth Opportunity student, meeting at Hub to let her know first hand

Test workshop visits:

get letter to vacate possibility 17th dated 1st, visit bank poor nervous state, manager advises to visit GP, sick not till 2-6-17 pacifying  I visit a probona law advice center to ask about liability towards visitors of workshop and their safety so I understand risk assessment responsibilities from my side and try to make a picture with other bodies: the management and the Council, freeholders of building in order to provide a complete area risk assessment

I am trying to contain the story and present the positive story of 8 years of service and exchange growth of community participation and wellbeing, the plans on the 5th were to transform the workshop in a more open more healing environment where people could come in and receive support in a more officialised way as per conversation with Camden Mind officer to bring service further into communities such as Camden wishing to set up platform to refer participants to our program

Week1 Friday 5- 12 May Set in motion: hard to eat or sleep, support from police officers and victim support

Test workshop visits:

Meet DoE student at Hub, talk to parent and school, not to tell her what happened until emotional stability recovered in touch with Victim support , a lot of people call for work but all has stopped on work front, Friday1 get abused by Rent men reported to Cllr week spent pacifying and informing police

called insurers to get information on such situation and establish risk assessment: no insurance possible for outside gunshot damages, or other people in workshop with me, or workshop content equipment stock or possessions while unit is not selfcontained: no possibility to lock from corridor

Trident visit me at home to reassure me  Inspector calls me I liase with student to know if she wishes to pass on her details I contact 7 sisters surgery and call office to tell the story first hand, I receive a call 3 days later that no help will be available, to relocate or compensation to help with difficult transition, losing 8 years worth of network and career progression



14-15 Gap — today is YouthDay

For this sad YouthDay2017 our thoughts go to the Grenfell and Manchester youths and families whose lives were shattered in a horrific way. We pray for all.
We offer to sketch in the Park at 4pm today and extended the invitation to all via twitter @circulaid

Having spent all 14-15 June preparing a first meeting with Haringey Council officials since the activities of CS4 stopped, 5-5-17, when a bullet was shot through our window while having a design session with a student who came to plan her line of clothing after her day job. She had tried to come the night before but there were too many men in front so decided not to get off the bus: she is one of the three founding members who were looking for direction aged 16 when the system had failed them in 2008=2009, and despite knowing the area and having helped to open CS4, she felt intimidated by the big group of men standing in front of the workshop.

So although we decided to blog everyday in support of developing her line and possibly motivate more behind the scene while the workshop is closed, I am sorry there was no time left for Blog creative input or anything else these past few days…

Handling the aftermath of a gunshot into a professional space is a huge task: working out the future of 8 creative community years at CS4… just writing the report in preparation of the meeting took 3 hours: it shows highlights of the Studio book where students wrote what they expected to do or did each time they visited.
The Studio book is over 50 pages, it gave everyone who entered the workshop a chance to comment, settle down and take ownership. It is history in the making.

I had hopes for a meeting leading towards cohesion and sharing hopes to work to make Haringey and Farm proud.
But for some reasons which I do not grasp the meeting was just about the building lease and the fact that I would be responsible for the cost of collateral damages created by the gunshot of window repairs and a rent for a space I am not able to use, as the area assessment report, the accountability report and occupational health report have not come in yet.

Having spent all my time pacifying the area and officials since 5-5-17, as well as try to understand what would be the best course of action for an 8 year creative endeavour bringing hope and skills in an innovative way, supporting youths, children, and women on one of the harshest London estate, it transpires so far, having spent time and efforts to connect with Haringey officials, that the plans to make the borough an inclusive prosperous borough do not include the support or development of circular economy for women or sustainable green positive models such as CS4 opened since 2009.

When CS4 opened the Frontline was an open line for youths recruitment, both young women and young men, the ladies basins were nearly on the ground, and since the workshop was closed after the gunshot, on occasional visits, I have noticed one of the men in a car coming back to the area. He had once peed in front of our shop on his own car wheel and used to shoot a fake gun to scare kids. Every time I visited the workshop there were men in front smoking, or just coming after 5 minutes I was there. I stopped by last Sunday and in front was a car: a woman then bent over into the car and her tunic was not long enough to cover her bare essentials with no sign of undergarment.

Being allergic to any kind of smoke (that was always a strength to help the youth quit smoking) makes it very hard to work behind a screen of illegal activities all recorded on a Haringey Camera… with unit holders being prevented to interact with the public as they would be entitled to.
I have informed the Management of the building about the difficult conditions, not being able to use the space during normal hours as a result and having to stop activities as a result of antisocial behaviour. I had written letters about it and never got answers.

Youths are missing on opportunities.
Women and children do not cross the road from the bus stop as a result of a constant use of the pavement by men.
So I wonder what it is like on other London Estates? or other parts of the world with similar estates?

A 14 year old volunteer for the Edinburgh Award program was not accepted in the local Hub kitchen: after checking with Haringey, 16 is the age. In the meantime her mother came to us as this was the only option for a placement within walking distance of her home, and having been part of the SEW programme herself in 2012 and gained employment as a result of advice given, she trusted CS4, although we both do not like the fact that smoke comes under the door while we are in studio, and nearly every time the youth was exposed to the illegal substance.
Within 4 months she was mugged in the nearby park with 2 friends walking home, lost her placement location due to a gunshot (which I have not explained to her as I work hard to keep positivity alive and know such news can induce trauma for life), and last week lost a friend to stabbing.
I have said something happened at the shop and we saw the 101 police note in the HUB, but I was waiting for some information before I could explain anything and also did not want to spend my time with her discussing negative behaviour or events, and we would have to work hard to make women stay positive despite all the negative male actions around us. We wish for peace to work and prosper and have to protect ourselves emotionally and physically to achieve this in one of the harshest environments.

After my visit to Haringey yesterday 15th June, I was given no reassurance or advice relating to the human factor of our position there in the aftermath of the gunshot or my concerns for the welfare of the youths on Broadwater Farm, who are denied an opportunity to advance in life as a result.

Having been told that the window broken by the gunshot is my responsibility, and that the rent in this period is too:

what am I to understand: that I should use this space and take a chance to put people- anyone- at risk, irrespectively of what has happened?

I also asked for a letter of recognition for serving the community for 8 years. A thank you from the authorities would be really welcome in this distressful time where, as a result of reckless action, thousands of hearts have been shattered…
I thought community relationships mattered…

As a professional, a letter of recommendation is essential, especially with a view to teach and PhD research to help pursue work to make a difference, adding to an academic career frame which started at Boston University, Wellesley College an MIT in 1987.

Who will account for hours spent on this matter since 5-5-17 where I have worked fulltime writing, phoning, meeting… in order to contain the story to avoid another wave of violence and give the authorities to know the story first hand to avoid unnecessary negativity?

Who in Haringey is responsible for, or going to help with, the human factor and the collateral damages?

Thank You Spurs Foundation

For the taster… measured up, weighed, pulse and tension checked, ready to go…

Healthy Break

Thank you Spurs for offering a way back to healthy lives…


Are circular a positive example of circular positive energy at work 8 year running on the notorious Broadwaterfarm Frontline. active and stoic in a difficult climate and in a building which is offers no physical frills.

Les Trois Muses

#WMTY 6-6-17 WorldDay Positive words…

In preparation of our Meeting 10th, 10:30-11 at Hub to discuss positive links between women,

we asked friends to bring 1 positive keyword they wish to illustrate with textile creations.

We give Credits to Maureen Bisognano and her colleagues for inspiring and illustrating this process of reversing negativity with using positive mottos and questions to allow a person to open their hearts to others:

“What Matters to You?” #WMTY since March1st changes the question to patients from What’s wrong with you??

A way to engage into a positive journey of owning our feelings, lives and creativity…

Twitter is such a wonderful place to discover World Movements raising wellbeing and awareness.

We also discovered the London Design Festival @L_D_F who chose Mayfair for the next festival in September…

How about Tottenham and 7sisters as our own world creative forum venue for women part of the Circular Economy saving textiles from Landfill, healing through creativity and now exposing the hope between all groups nourished since 2008…



#NotSoEasy To Cut the Perfect #LavenderHeart Free Hand…

 #LavenderHEARTS #workshops #4health

Every Heart comes from Factory offcuts which whould have gone in bin, the fleece was made from Plastic bottles by Polartec USA then turn into a Jacket designed by Cat from CS4 for SueMe support Nature project

Now they can help us link hands mind and heart into helping #naturemature on #WorldEnvironmentDay

How do you #Celebrate #Nature #today?

@UN-water @UNEP @Natureforall @wearesueme @circulaid

 FROM this jacket which took 3 years to develop… came all our #LavenderHearts… with a few drops of lavender oil you can keep your wool favourite pieces #alive for #longer without disrupting the natural cycle… Made to measure Sportswear Hybrid Biker Peace jacket to link countries through work not war… http://www.echoicjacket.com

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